Thursday, May 16, 2013

Yoda Boy

Well, little guy, you're gone.

I actually remember saying to Joe on the ride home from getting you that I know you would die before me and I should protect my heart, but that I just could not.  You were so adorable from the first moment.


I knew the moment I saw you, that your name would be Yoda.  It wasn't really on"the list" but it is who you are and who you were.

When I took you from Joe, you snuggled, irritated, delighted, and amused me.
You made your way to my shoulder, rested innocently for a great while, and then made your way to my glasses.  You sweetly and adorably chewed my glasses while sitting on my shoulder.

Yes, you are a menace to certain things.

Rather, I guess, are no longer a menace to anything.

Dammmmm.

I cannot describe what happened to me when you came to our home.  I ALWAYS described myself as a non-fan of animals.  You came, and I turned into pet central.

I didn't even mind your baby spit or your teener tongue.

Not even a little.

It's all I got for tonight for playtime.

Blessings,
K

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Thoughts on "Breakfast"

On our first date, Joe and I saw the film The Breakfast Club.  Over the years, we watched it several more times.

I love that film.  Some critics assert the filmmaker didn't understand or aptly portray teen angst.  Having scene the film as a teen, I thought he did a great job.

There's a scene in the movie that always horrified - and fascinated - me.
John Bender: [Imitating his Father] Stupid, worthless, no good, goddamn, freeloading son of a b****. Retarded, big mouth, know-it-all, a**hole, jerk.
[Imitating his Mother]
John Bender: You forgot ugly, lazy and disrespectful.
[Father's voice]
John Bender: Shut up b****! Go fix me a turkey pot pie.
[His own voice]
John Bender: No dad, what about you?
[Father's voice]
John Bender: F*** you.
[His own voice]
John Bender: No dad, what about you?
[Father's voice]
John BenderF***:  you.
[His own voice]
John Bender: Dad, what about you?
[Father's voice]
John BenderF***:  you!
[Pantomimes getting punched in the face]
Brian Johnson: Is that for real?
John Bender: You wanna come over sometime?
Judd Nelson played his part perfectly, doncha think?

This scene was pretty much my day today.  

Monday, May 6, 2013

The Daughter Diary

I wasn't a favorite of anyone.   My mom had Scott and my dad had Staci.  That's always been pretty cool with me because it freed me to be me.  I chose to excel at school, go to church more often than just Sundays, and indulge my passion for reading great literature, developing cooking skills, and volunteering.

Why did I mention mom and dad and then follow with that list of stuff?  Because each of those are things I care about, and didn't get from my parents, just like their hobbies and the things they excelled at didn't interest me.

School?  Neither of my parents cared about it - or they just didn't have the support they needed to make school matter.  

Church?  They only went to church when they had to go - and after church was a complete bitch session about who dissed mom (hey, if you don't want to shake my hand, I'm cool with that!  Oh.  And, dad?  Trying to get us to cry by squeezing our fingers into the pew?  No.  That's sort of anti-Gospel, ya know?).  

Literature?  Mom used to read romantic fiction, but nothing of substance. Dad? No.

Cooking?  Mom was a decent cook, but had no passion for it.  

Volunteerism?  Neither of them are volunteers.  

These things belong to me alone, and they are the best parts of me.

Being excellent is always my goal.  I confess to not being excellent in many ways.
  • I'm not an excellent wife, but I have an excellent marriage.
  • I'm not an excellent mother, but I have excellent sons.
  • I'm not an excellent friend, but I have excellent relationships.
  • I'm not an excellent pianist, but I accompany people like a madwoman.
  • I'm not an excellent student, but I have one of those GPAs to admire.
  • I'm not an excellent employee, but I improve what I am responsible to complete every day. 
  • I'm not an excellent businesswoman, but I always do what I promise.
  • I'm not an excellent mentor, but I can get people to do what they are called to do.
There are many places I don't excel.  But we all have our talents.

My saddest revelation is that I cannot say I am an excellent daughter.

I was once.  It was when Grandpa Stuart was dying and my dad had been assigned times to care for him.  My dad couldn't care for him, but I could.  I saw giving him a bath, taking him to the bathroom, and making him comfortable as acts of mercy and reveled in the "work" of the day.  I felt like I was actually being the hands and feet of Christ.  It wasn't pretty, but it was merciful.   My dad was so thankful for my help with the things he could not do.  It was the closest connection I have ever felt to a parent. 

At this point in my life, I have no contact with my mother, who is owned by her addictions.

I also have issues with my dad. 

I am thankful that I am the person I am, and I attribute much of my strength to my parents.  Being who they were made me who I am.

All I can say and hope, is this:  Heavenly Father, please show me the paths of righteousness.  At the same time, I maintain faith in this:  All things work to the good of those who love the Lord.

And I do love the Lord.

With all my heart.

Regards,
Kari

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

A New Beginning!

So.

(I laugh every time I say that and write it.  It's really how I talk!)

Today Tim Stanoch of the Church of St Benedict called and formally offered me the position I applied to take about six weeks ago.

This position was created by my heavenly Father.  I just know it.  Every single thing Tim described as a job responsibility is something I love (LOVE!!!!!!!) to do.

And, strangely, the hours fit in my already really busy schedule.  I shouldn't have to miss anything in my life to make it to this new job.  How can this not be God-inspired?

The church itself is beautiful.  The energy I feel there encourages me.  The people I've met already feel like friends.

I went to the church website the other day to learn about the people.  Cliff Borgerding, the Parish Pastoral Council Chair, wrote about his recent presentations at the weekend Masses.  He was talking about volunteering at the church by participating more fully at the Mass as a Minister.  Look what he wrote:
You don't need to be an extraordinary person to serve in any of these ministries.
TRUE!

We don't need to be extraordinary.

Know why?

Because Jesus is.

We can't, won't, shouldn't top Jesus.

So no worries.

Come with me.  Serve.  Be filled with the Spirit.  Jesus will love that. 

God Bless,
Kari