Thursday, November 21, 2013

A Writer Who Cannot Write

I have the BEST QUOTE EVER on my title page: "In spite of everything I shall rise again: I will take up my pencil, which I have forsaken in my great discouragement, and I will go on with my drawing." 

Know what though?  Vincent Van Gogh  took up his instrument and used it.  He wrote despite the agony it cost him.  And aren't we glad he did?

It is never the case that I have nothing to say.

It is far too often the case that I have nothing to say that I want share with people

It takes a great deal of courage to write about hurts and failures and recovery.  And courage takes energy and time away from other great things.  I think that's my failing: I don't have enough time for anything really, really good.

During our trip to Florida this year, I was alone a majority of the time.  I chose not to go to baseball - like Joe said, "Why would she come watch baseball when we're living on the beach?!?!?"  I stayed on the beach.

And I thought.  I thought and thought and thought and thought.  And then I thought some more.

I don't want to be this busy anymore.

Weirdly, though, the things I thought were expendable aren't, while the things I thought were the bread and butter aren't.

What does that mean?

I hope it means I will be making big, big changes in my life over the next year or so. 

Pray about it.  Would you?  I no longer wish to be a write who cannot write.

Kari

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